I want to see you

God I want to see you

In the life that I live

I long to feel your touch

In what you have to give

But I’m afraid there are times

When my vision is not so clear

I do not see you moving

And I give in to fear

I see the loss in this life

I see the rejection and the pain

I don’t understand

What is there to gain?

But I need to remember

It’s not about here and now

I’m living for eternity

For my future somehow

God I look to you

Even when I do not see

I surrender all to you,

The things that I want to be

I pray that you show me

Yourself in the place

I need to have your touch

Oh Daddy, I need your grace

Thank you that you are here

Even when I do not feel you

Even if it doesn’t seem like it

I know your promises are true

This World Has Nothing for Me

This world has nothing for me

I’m learning to let go

This world is full of sorrow

More than one can know

This world has nothing for me

All I see is pain

This world with all its pleasures

I see nothing for me to gain

I’m chasing after Jesus

Cause he truly is my all

I’m leaving all behind

To simply follow my call

I don’t know what it looks like

Or how to decipher this world

But I’m following my Jesus

On Him my burdens hurled

I choose to look to heaven

Where worship will abound

I’m looking to my future

I’m not looking around

Cause this world has nothing for me

But broken dreams and thoughts

I’m fighting for my Jesus

Because for me he has fought

I give my passion to Him

With everything that I got

I feel I have nothing in me

But I give as I’ve been taught

This world has nothing for me

I’ve decided to let it go

There is nothing to be desired

So into His Kingdom I will sow

Decisions

There are some times in life when everything just seems to be confused. There are some decisions that just seem too big to make. There are questions that just don’t seem to have answers. There are times when you know God is there, but He just seems to be silent. What do you do in those times? Do you just wait them out? Do you just stand on faith and believe that you will get through and just wait? Or are we called to fight? Are we called to fight for the truth? Are we called to fight for what we believe is right? How do we know? How do we know how to say “no” to some things, and “yes” to others? How do we know what it is that God is saying when we don’t hear his voice? How do we know when we don’t understand which way is up. Do we just stand and wait, or do we fight for that knowledge?

I believe that there is direction! I believe that there is direction in Christ! I believe that there may be a battle, but the war is already won! I believe that even when we don’t see what way is up, when we don’t know which way we are to go, we can trust on the promises of God. We can trust his word! He says in Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” That means to me that we can plan all that we want, we can get stressed, we can try so hard to do what is “right”, but in the end, the Lord will prevail. Why do we get so worried? Look at Proverbs 16:9 “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps”. Very much the same concept; we can even try to do something against God, we can be independent and try to plan our own way, but God still is the one who is determining our footsteps. Why do we worry so much? God has promised us guidance. Look at Isaiah 30:20, 21 “Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, “This is the way; walk in it”.

            He will be there for us, especially when we are looking to follow him. Take a look at Matthew 6:33,34 “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”. Or Proverbs 3:5,6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight”.  Those are some pretty amazing promises. I think instead of trying so hard to plan which way we are going in life, let’s just take some time going after God. I think what we need more than anything is closeness to God.

Proverbs 16:33 states “The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord.” He is the one that plans our footsteps. Jeremiah 10:23 says “I know, O Lord, that a man’s life is not his own; it is not for man to direct his steps” According to these verses, it is not even our job to plan our steps. God is the one who is directing us. All we got to do is simply rest in him. I like the way that Psalm 37:3-6 states it “Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun”. We don’t have to do a whole lot, just delight ourselves in the Lord; trust completely in him. Stop having so much faith in our own capability to make decisions and trust in God’s.

Can we stop spending all our time worrying about which way is up; worrying about hearing God’s voice; worrying about whether to say “yes” or “no” to things in life, and just spend some real quality time with Him? Can we focus on what really matters and trust him to take care of the rest? I know, I know, all that comes up is the but… but… but… what about this decision that needs to be made today? What about the money that I have to have tomorrow? What about the person I have to give an answer to? What about the business that I want to start? Just stop thinking about these questions for a moment and start meditating on the verses above. Once we truly let go, I believe that God will make the answers abundantly clear to us. Look at the promises, meditate on the verses, and then step out and do something! Stop spending your time wallowing in your own indecision. Make a decision, and then stand on it by faith. By faith believing that the above promises really are true and that He WILL guide us! Don’t be so afraid to make a mistake! There IS victory in Christ!

Gandi… Wow, I just watched the movie last night, and it powerfully impacted me. What impressed me the most was the power of influence. Gandi did not just live for his own life. He did not just try to be the best person that he could be in himself; he went out to influence people. Imagine telling an entire nation not to fight. Imagine trying to impact that many people, to tell that many people that it is for their benefit that they lay down their anger and do not resist those that are against them with bloodshed. Imagine telling an angry mob that they should not fight! And then imagine actually believing that they will listen! Wow. Gandi knew what he believed, and he knew it so strongly that he was not afraid to tell the entire nation to live it. Imagine the doubt that must have went through his mind. Imagine how he could have questioned “What if I am wrong?” But he simply stood strong on his position, and he literally changed a nation. He caused a nation to quit fighting simply by believing it was possible and living that belief out!

            Imagine believing so strongly in your cause that you do not only live it, but you also influence others to live it!  I am deeply challenged. I live my life generally feeling like I am only responsible for myself. I allow others to have their own beliefs, and live their own lives even if I feel like they are completely wrong. I do not seek to impact. I allow the Bible and the words that I read to impact only myself, I do not seek to allow them to impact those around me. I see the life of Gandi, and I see the incredible power of influence. By myself I can make a small difference in the world around me, but if I seek to influence others, if I seek to make my life a call to others to follow Jesus as well, then I can make a huge difference in the world. There is such an incredible power in influence! I have realized that I am so wrong, so terribly wrong. My job is not just to live for myself, its not just to follow Christ myself the best that I can. It is to influence.

            My challenge and my question today is, how strongly do you believe in Jesus Christ? How strongly do you believe in his power to change lives? And are you willing to allow that belief to permeate who you are so strongly that you are willing to actually take responsibility for leading a nation in that direction? There can be no questioning “What if I am wrong?” You must be so strong on your position that you believe without a shadow of a doubt that you are leading many people in the right direction.

            It is not until we are that strong on our beliefs that we can make an impact. But if we can say “I know whom I have believed”, and truly mean it, I believe that we can change a nation. Psalm 2:8 says “Ask of me and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.” God wants to give us the nations, but we got to believe him! Are we willing to stand on what we believe, to be confident enough in the truth of it that we are willing to impact nations? How big do we believe that our God is?

Purpose within longings

I was thinking today, thinking about purpose. Like what is my purpose here on earth? I’m sure that is a question that has been asked many times, by many different people. What is my purpose? Is my purpose simply to enjoy life, to do all that I can do to make sure that my life is comfortable, or does my purpose possibly go deeper than that?

I look around me, and I see so many people. People all going for some dream, or longing for something or wishing life was different in some way, and I wonder, what is the purpose in that? I’m not saying that to have desires in life is wrong. I do not think that it is at all, I believe, in fact, that God wired us with desires. He wired us to long for things, to dream for things, to live, and to love. But I guess I just had a thought, and maybe it’s not that great of a thought, but could my purpose be found in those longings? I mean the unmet ones? My question is not if the fulfillment of those longing could help me find my purpose, but that simply the existence of those unmet longings are my purpose?

Let me try to explain. The existence of unmet longings makes me more aware of my pain. They allow me to see those things in life that I want; I long for, but maybe never will have. Now once I see that pain I have two choices; either focus on the pain and try to do everything that I can to alleviate it, or focus on God. Focus on God may seem like a cliché answer, but bear with me.

Pain, rejection, losing someone, loving, but not being loved in return, losing what you have fought for all your life, lonliness; these are some of the greatest things that cause us pain in life. But could it be that these are the things that make the greatest gift to God?  Is it possible that we can thank God for these things because they give us the opportunity to bring more glory to his name? Is there more depth to a trial then the trial itself?

Maybe, in these longings our job is not to do all that we can do to get rid of the longing, to find a solution, to fix the relationship, to get what we want. Maybe our job is simply to find out how to have joy and peace in God throughout the trial. Maybe our focus is totally wrong. I know there are things that we want, and we want them really bad, and then those things become our focus instread of God. But God has said that he is enough for us. That means that he is enough! That means that no matter how deep a longing can be in our hearts, our purpose is not to fulfull that longing, but to find God in a way that goes deeper than that longing.

I believe that the root of all of our longings in some way is God. So instead of focusing on that longing, why don’t we allow ourself to let go of the longing and focus on God? This may sound overly simplistic for those who are truly struggling with huge loss, with legitimate struggles, with pain that is unexpressable. But I believe that God can go deeper than even that. These struggles are indeed a gift from God, an opportunity to truly find Him in a deeper way. Paul stated that he learned to be content in any and every situation. That truly is a gift. Can we learn to find our contentment within our circumstances, within the places that we have that pain? Can we find our purpose in God within our longings?

The Mirror

          
           The word is like a mirror is it not? I have been looking into the word, I have been reading it, I have been studying it. But I haven't really been seeing my reflection in it. Maybe I am not reading it in the right way?

            So when I look at verses like James 1:27 "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world". I wonder how much of me this reflects. How much do I actually look after those widows and orphans? I'm so wrapped up in my own life that I forget to see those around me! This world is so incredibly full of needy people.   

            Then there is the verse that states that we are to remain in him. John 15:5 "If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing". And I wonder, how much am I actually remaining in him? He says that "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you" (John 15:7). I don't see that happening in my life. I have been asking, but I have not yet been receiving. Is that a good indication of the fact that I am not yet remaining in him?

            And then what about 1 John 3:6 "no one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him." And I realize that there is still a lot of sin in my life. I do continue to sin. I am not living the perfect life that I wish I was living! So does that mean that I have not even seen him?  

            So I'm looking at these verses, and there are so many more, and I'm realizing that I am really looking into a mirror. And I'm not really liking what I am seeing. I am seeing an imperfect human being with so incredibly many faults. I do not match up to what I want to see when I look at the word. I do not want to be like the man in James 1:23,24 "Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like". Is that not the easy route? To realize we can never make it, and so give up and just continue on the way that we are living? Is there somehow another option?

            Then I realized that it doesn't stop there, and that is what can give me hope! James 1:25 states "But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it--he will be blessed in what he does". That is the man that I want to be! I want to continue to look intently into that perfect law, and then live in it!

            And I believe that the perfect law that gives freedom is not the traditional law that we look at. When Jesus died on the cross he made a new covenant with us. The rules to this new covenant are found in 1 John 3:23 "And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us". Its actually pretty simple, but so incredibly complicated. But we just got to believe in the name of his Son. And when we do that, all of our sins are washed away!

            Hebrews 10:14 states that "by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy". So truly when I look into the mirror of the word, I need to look at this mirror with the sacrifice of Jesus in my mind. He has washed away all of my sins so before him I am completely perfect! So by the amazing grace of God, that mirror now only reflects His perfection.

            This is the only perfect law that could bring freedom! There is no way I could ever live up to the traditional law. Romans 3:23 states "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God". I cannot, ever, by my own works make myself perfect. I can look into the mirror of the law all that I want, and try and try to "do" all these things written in it, but in the end I will only be condemning myself. It is not my righteousness that allows me to look intently into the perfect law and continue to live it in. It is the righteousness of Christ!

            Galatians 3:2 states "Did you receive the Spirit by observing the law, or by believing what you heart? Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?" And that is what I so easily do. I look into the traditional law and I try to be perfect, but when I step into faith, realizing that I am not perfect, nor can I ever make myself to be, then Jesus makes me perfect. Then I can look intently into the perfect law, I can live in it, I can keep it ever before my mind so I do not forget it, and I can know that I stand perfect before Christ. I can look into that mirror, and instead of seeing my own mess, I can see Christ's perfection. And then, through that faith (its the faith, not the works that count), I can be blessed in whatever I do.

Living on purpose

           So I was thinking the other day about living life. How much of it do we do on purpose? Now that may seem like a little bit of a funny question, but let me explain. Think about the things that really matter to you in life. The things that, in a way, define your life, these are the things that if people would ask you what really matters to you, you would think of first. To me, these are God, family, friends, relationships, people and ministry. Other people may have others. Then I wonder how much of the time do we really prioritize them? Like do we fit these things into our lives on purpose, or do they just happen to somehow, maybe, fit in around everything else around us?

            Its easy, its so easy just to take life as it comes, and sometimes it does get crazy hectic and busy, and its all we can do just to keep our heads above water. But are we stopping and thinking about these things that are making us busy, and really analyzing whether or not we want them to take precedence in our lives? Are we really living on purpose, or are we just letting life happen to us? Think about one of those things in life that you have just always wanted to do, but just never had time to actually get down to it and do it. Maybe we have to stop just long enough to actually think about what we do want in life. Maybe we have to take the time to live on purpose. Like maybe go for coffee with that person that we have always wanted to, but just didn't get a chance to. Or go hang out with a family member. Or most importantly, purposefully take the time to spend with God.

            I don't want us  to just let life happen to us. I want us to actually decide what we want, and then go for it. I want to see us bulding relationships on purpose, not just to let them happen, if they do. I want our lives to be defined by purposeful choices, not just default choices. Can we each take the time to choose what we really want, and then live our lives on purpose in that direction? Can we find and define our values and then live for them, instead of whatever comes our way? Can we actually truly live our lives on purpose?